How to Get Your Partner to Open Up

couple communicating

Are you having a hard time communicating with your partner? That is a normal occurrence in most relationships. Some of the communication barriers include pent-up resentment and talking patterns we fall into that can be hard to kick. Your partner may be having a hard time opening up if they tend to stonewall or avoid conflict.


Stonewalling is the practice of refusing to answer questions or engage in conversation through evasive speech. Short, terse responses to your questions are one example of this behavior on display.


Avoidance is the practice of circumventing problems or pushing them off. This might look like comments such as “I’m just not in the mood” or “another time” during every opportunity to address the issue at hand.

Some Tips to Help Your Partner Open Up

  • Give them some space, do not nag
  • Ask about how they’re doing with a genuine interest
  • Consider couple’s counseling

If your partner is having a hard time opening up, there are probably some communication issues in the relationship. Learning how to communicate with one another can truly improve the overall quality of your relationship. It can be helpful to identify if you or your partner have passive, aggressive, or assertive tendencies. Most people have some combination of these three ways of speaking.

In couple’s counseling, you can explore how these different themes show up. You can address your partner’s tendencies towards avoidance or stonewalling. You can explore different ways to give your partner the space they need while also expressing genuine curiosity over their life and how they’re coping.

Romantic partners often put off conflict resolution through stonewalling and avoidance. But how do you get your significant other to open up? You can give them the space they need without nagging. You can ask about how they’re doing with genuine interest. You can also consider couple’s counseling. At Valiant Living, we support couples having intimacy issues linked to substance use or co-occurring mental illness. Our men’s only facility located in Denver, Colorado has both inpatient and outpatient services. If you feel like you are at a communication impasse with your loved one over their addiction, we may be a sense of support for you through this hardship. Our expert staff will help you navigate the treatment process. To learn more about the services we offer, you can contact us today at (303) 952-5035.