Written by Valiant Living Recovery on Wednesday, June 10th, 2020
As you started making your way through the 12-Steps, your primary intention was to learn about yourself. It is crucial to spot the patterns in your life that hold you back. In this way, you can identify your character defects and be rid of them or turn them into strengths. The problem with discovering your character defects is that once you have the information, it can be confusing to know what to do with all the data.
Character defects are considered to be all the flaws that you have allowed to pile up without taking any responsibility for them. These shortcomings are what give you mental permission to silently suffer or take out your distress on someone else. To endure character defects, we turned to alcohol and drugs. Unfortunately, drinking and using drugs becomes a solution that only throws gasoline on an already burning fire.
Your character defects point out that you are imperfect as a human. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, you can use these to measure what you need to work on. These imperfections are really blessings waiting to be called upon for some change. They provide valuable insight if you are willing to alter your thinking and your behavior. In fact, understanding your defects is a profound advantage, but it requires introspection. Knowing that you will never be perfect is a huge step in the right direction.
Nobody really ever wants to be selfish, dishonest, jealous, self-seeking, or fearful. To admit these traits can be stressful and overwhelming, but it’s necessary to grow in recovery. If you keep suppressing the things you believe are wrong with you, then you will disregard the things that are holding you back from staying sober. You can redeem yourself in a big way by replacing your character defects with recovery principles that will serve you well.
One of the reasons you are probably unable to get sober is that you have an aversion to accepting the suggestions given in recovery. Surrendering to the fact that you cannot drink or use drugs without harming yourself or others is essential. Conceding to your character defects as a road map to freedom will also help you decipher how you can alter your conduct.
The more you resist taking a look at your character defects, the more you will stay miserable by your own doing. When you are trying to take care of the character defects that are glaring at you, going the distance is a must. Your flaws will continue to pop up, which makes dealing with them a marathon rather than a sprint. They will continue to keep coming back until you do something to eradicate them for good.
Your character defects will keep you circling the drain if you continue to live in them. There is no way for you to make changes if you do not recognize what is keeping you from progressing in your recovery. You can only make changes as your character defects are revealed to you. Some of them will be obvious, but others will be part of the evolution you will experience while looking inside yourself to find freedom. Yes, work must take place to move you in a different direction. You will be better for it if you hang on for the ride and allow the transformation to occur.
Hanging onto character defects with a kung fu grip is actually pretty natural for humans. Staying complacent often takes precedence over wanting to make changes that will help them be a better friend, co-worker, or family member. Either they think it will be too difficult or they feel that trying to change will not work anyway, so they give up altogether. Letting go of character defects that make relationships hard to handle, or hold you back from being all you can be, will serve you better in the long run. Your relationships, your job, your household, and many other facets of your life will improve just by identifying your character defects and tweaking them with positivity.
Sitting in self-pity because of all the shame and guilt you feel is understandable – for a bit. Feeling remorse for the past is part of accepting responsibility for the harm you’ve done. Eventually, however, you have to stop feeling sorry for yourself and get moving towards the solution offered in your recovery. Be rid of the doom and gloom and opt-in for blooming right where you are. Staying stuck in your past will only bring about negativity, which stems from your shame and guilt. Allowing yourself to get into acceptance that you are a good person who did bad things under the influence of drugs and alcohol may be the breakthrough you need. Now that the substances are taken away, you finally have a chance to find happiness in the growth you are exhibiting.
Character defects may seem like they will be impossible to get rid of, but you can do it. Start by being kind to yourself and start doing the next indicated step in your recovery. Taking suggestions by others who have once been where you are now will guide you to become the sober person you were meant to be in recovery.
Valiant Living is here to help start the ball rolling in your recovery so that you can be free of alcohol and drugs. Offering a full range of recovery and mental health services, we offer “Expanded Recovery” to enrich our clients’ lives in mind, body, and spirit. With the power of recovery, clients are restored to full health and experience life-changing healing. Call us today for more information: 303-536-5463